fifty shades of fandom
by Sunstreamed
Summary: From a young age Anna's mother has resented her for stealing her youthfulness, beauty and elegance. Anna was thrown from pillar to post, across many foster families, until after her birthday she moves back into her mother's life. It's not long until Mrs Robinson is back to her old tricks and Anna is sent away to her mother's closest friend, Mr Grey, where she's taught to submit.
1. chapter 1

I'd been with mother four years now. She lives the life of luxury, with expensive tastes and lavish parties. She has no regrets in life. None. Except from one: me.

Today was just like any other, I was in the drawing room cleaning for mother whilst her guests arrive. Candelabras decorate the mahogany table, behind that the walls are embellished with golden swirls, replicating those you see in castles. Tasteless art rests on the walls, depicting a sense of uselessness, which is reflected upon my mother herself.Seattle was renowned for its extravagant parties and mother always aims to please. The Grey's are amongst the extensive guest list tonight, mother's most closest friends. Never has she managed to be acquainted with them in her house, it's an exciting time for her, a more dreadful time for me.

From being young I knew Elena was reluctant to having a child. I was passed from maids to nannies, until she could not stand the sight of me no longer. At age four I was taken into the foster system, where I was dragged up by nearly every family in Portland. It wasn't until I reached adulthood, when Elana wanted me back. I had no other choice. I was a girl pushed out of the system, no place to go, but only into the arms of her "loving" mother.

"Anastasia… Anna honey, the rest guests will be here soon. Make sure everything is immaculate." The sweetness drips like venom from her shrewd tongue. It's poison that will bite me later after everyone has left.

I continue cleaning and handing ridiculously small canapes to portentous men and women. I just long to be upstairs reading Hardy or Austen, rather than being mother's waiting maid. Sometimes these events finish early, so I seek in a chapter or two before a beating, but tonight is already dragging. Of course it's going to last longer, she's testing you. The more you slip up, the harder she's going to come down on you! I frown, Darcy would never let Elizabeth be treated like this. But then again I am not Elizabeth nor do I have a Darcy.

The party gets into full swing, but the Grey's haven't even arrived yet. This only aggravated the beast that roams the drawing room, examining every movement I make. My fingers tremble under the tray of glasses that I'm holding. She wants you to fail Anna. Silently,i hope for no harm tonight, but that's a dream not worth wishing for. I steady my trembling fingers under the silver tray and focus on my walking. I weave between beautifully dressed people, offering my service at any convenient time. This is my life. A life of faking smiles, behaving in a particular manner and trying to avoid being scolded at all costs. My hopes for the future seem to flit away into the distance. With each wrong move I make, the harder I think it is to escape the claps of my darling mother.

" Anastasia, the Grey's are here. Come along,go greet them"

"Yes, mother" I sigh.

" My name is Elena, Anastasia. You know that by now, or do I need to scold that into you?" She hisses into my ear.

I follow in pursuit to the hallway. Mr and Mrs Grey stand there beaming. They are dressed in coordinating outfits. Mr Grey, a cream cashmere jumpers with black dress pants and Mrs Grey with a matching cream dress with black heels . Their appearance is pristine, doll like even. I suppose they could come out of a novel by the Brontë sisters. I chuckle to myself at that part. Mrs Grey hugs my mother, whilst her husband kisses her cheek, as she welcomes them into the hub of the party. They both say a hearty hello towards me, but Elena soon pushes them towards the drawing-room. Quickly, I go to shit the door, to keep the draft out, however I'm stopped by a handsome young man running in. He pushes past me, murmuring a sorry, and glides into the conjoined room.

Once I'm back into the party, I am hounded by people for more drinks, as if they are savages. As I move hastily towards the kitchen, I spot my mother and a figure arguing quietly near the pantry.

" What are you doing here Christian?" She whispers aggressively. So his name's Christian. He's gorgeous.

"Elena, am I not allowed to spend the night with my parents?" He mocks. I stifle a little giggle.

"Why now Christian, I haven't heard from you in years. You disappeared on me remember."

" Yes we'll I've had some exploring to do haven't i."

"You know I never wanted to take it that far."

"Shut up Elena. We both know you did. You're a sadistic whore." I gasp at his filthy words.

"We both know that I brought out the best in you Christian." I stare at them complete bewildered. My heart races as I hear him speak. The way his mouth curves around each syllable and how his tongue flicks every now and then. I am simply mesmerised.

"Words got around that you have a new play thing now" he probes. Her face curves in discomfort.

"I have nothing of the sort. I offered you what I wanted you never took it."

"What about that girl?" His eyes flit my way.

"That girl is no concern of yours"

"She's very beautiful Elena."

"Shut up, you fool." He laughs and walks away. I see pain in his eyes. The same pain I try to hide daily. My heart begins to face again. He noticed me. Someone actually noticed me. He clearly got to her, digging at some nerves buried deep down. Deep,deep down.

My wrist is grabbed from behind, sharp nails dig into it which limits my movement. I hiss at the pain. Mothers face jolts forward towards mine, as she pulls me to one side.

Her long nails press further into my skin, cutting me slightly. I grit my teeth.

"You stupid bitch, don't speak to him. I mean it Anastasia, you will be punished" I shake, trying to free myself from her iron clasp.i just simply nod, complying with her request. It's simple enough. I just need to avoid him at all costs to save my own backside. She eventually let's go, glaring at me as she goes back to her needy guests. Such an attentive host she is.

From across the busy room, Christian behind to stare at me. His grey orbes digging feel, trying to assess me in every possible way. It reminded me much of mother. Her eyes were always on me, so I know I can only steal this glance for a couple of seconds longer. His chocolate brown hair compliments hid grey eyes, the sharp richness just pulls me in. His jaw is sharp and is decorated with stubble that I just want to brush against my skin. I love the way he is dressed. A smile black suit that hugs him in the right places. One look and I just yearn for him. For Christian. If my mother could see me now, god forbid, I would be upstairs waiting for a punishment. My trance is quickly broken by the sound of crashing silverware. I am hunched forward, falling into the table of expensive everything. My feet just seem to have no fundamental control. I just simply fall.

I come crashing down I to the table with a huge THUD! Candles fly everywhere and flames seem to ignite the satins and silks that adorn the table. Reds and oranges file my vision. The fire is contained and small, but still no one seems to help. They just gawk. I'm so ashamed and embarrassed, tears trickle down my face. Crying,I sit there with small pockets of flames around me. The table is broken in half , food and silverware cost the floor. I can just see my mother's face. Stages of shock, horror and anger, move quickly across her face. Anger inevitably sticks and I know I'm in for a good hiding. Her friends seem to vacate, signifying the end of this dreadful night. However a few familiar faces remain; the Grey's and Christian.

The Grey's go to my mother consoling her, ignoring the fact that I can barely move. But Christian makes his way towards me. I hold up my hand In Front of my torso, signifying for him to stop. It would only make matters worse. If I wasn't so fixated on his beautiful features, then I'd never be in this situation.Of course he ignores my hand gestures, moving even closer towards me. In a swift movement, he scoops me up into his arms like a baby.I try to fight back. My hand fly everywhere, my feet spiral in all different directions trying to free myself from his grasp. His grip tightens, as I begin to raise my voice, drawing indefinite attention towards us. The greys gawk at us, probably ashamed and embarrassed by actions.

From this angle Christian Grey looks even more gorgeous. I love his hair, his lovely eyes and his lips. Ohh boy his lips. I am brought to reality. I kick and I scream. My mother's eyes burn into the back of my head, scolding me. I quiver. Christian's hands brush the small of my back, it spasms against his touch.

"Don't touch me." I scream. Tears fall. His hands touch that spot yet again.

"I said don't fucking touch me." I sob.

"Anastasia go with Christian, please." I see my mother bite her tongue.

My body slumps against his. His fingers never touch my back again, as I'm carried up stairs. Never have I felt this ashamed. I slightly pray, lord please take me now. I close my eyes, as blackness waves over me.


	2. chapter 2

I wake to the strong burning sensation down my back. It hurts. My eyes creep open, scared to look. Oh gosh, it really hurts. My eyebrows knit together, as my jaw clenches. Not this again.

_Hot… too hot…oh Lord it's hot_.

I can barely see what's happening, as tears prick my eyes. Pain is immanent, scorching me from the inside as well as out. I rotate my head to left to search for the source of the pain. There stood right behind me is the cold hearted bitch. My mother.

In her cold,wrinkled hands, she told a candle from the dining room. It's embossed with gold leaves weaving around the base up towards the was of the candle. She flips it down, In the direction in my exposed back. Hot, melted was, drips down the shaft of the candle, slowly reaching the wick. Little droplets pool into the air and fall free down on top my spine. My eye widen and I try to move, yet I'm shackled to the iron cast bed. Struggling, I pull against the restrains as the was hits my flesh. It burns, digging deep and then solidifying under the coolness of the room. Help. My mind silently wishes for a savour, someone to stop this.

"why… why are y-you doing this?" I whimper between tears.

"Anastasia, you wreck my celebration I wreck that lovely skin if yours. You did that to me remember. I have thousand of marks due to you."

"Please.." I beg. My hands pull again, trying to free myself, but she just stands there and laughs.

"Oh, Anna, my dearest Anna. You really need to learn some manners. I told you specifically to not talk to Mr Grey, and what did you do!" Every word is harsh against her tongue.

"I… I didn't m-mean to. H-he came t-o...to me." I sob.

"And you think I'll believe you, you worthless little girl".

She hisses at me as she tilts the candle again. "STOPPPP!" I scream, tugging against the rope. My mind protests, as I simply sit there and let the droplets drip on to my skin. Little scolded bumps raise upon my skin, sizzling under the wax. Her hand is fixed, dripping the wax continuously. I hiss and scream, begging for her to stop.

"I'm sorry." I sob for forgiveness.

"You will learn your lesson. You will not defy me." Her voice echoes in the room.

"Please"

She grins as she drops the naked flame on to my skin. The smile stretching from ear to ear, like the Cheshire cat. But more like the mad batter, she simply stands there watching me absorb the pain she's inflicting. My body erupts in pains, each nerve sizzling to the end. Tears fall so much that I can't see. I can hear her jimmi choo shoes click against the floor, as she comes closer to me. Her frail hard untie the rope from around my fists, releasing me from the restraints. My wrists are raw from the rope. Little slashes are apparent from my struggles and pools of blood start to fall to the floor. I manage to shrug the candle from my back and onto the floor. Thankfully the flame has dwindled down to just and orange wick, so I don't have to worry about causing another fire tonight. I can focus on my blazed back.

The door clicks as I turn to run at Elena. My body slams against the door and I burst into more tears. For a second, I sit there ignoring the intense pain surging through my skeleton. Then, I run towards my closet, grabbing my thickest coat, shrugging it around my throbbing naked flesh. My bed sinks, as I slump down in it, holding myself. I pull my knees up to my chest, rocking against the mattress. The coolness soothes my back almost numbing it completely. Why can't it be different? She was supposed to want me now. She didn't want you then, why should she want you now. My mind battles against me, counteracting every possible conclusion I try to come up with.

She never loved you.

With my legs curled to my chest, I fall into an uncomfortable sleep, my mind wandering into the deep grey eyes.

I wake to shuffling and muffled whispers from the other side of the wall. Checking the clock beside me, it reads 3:00 am. Who is up at this time?

"Take her with you Christian."

"No Elena." His voice is rough and laced with sleep. If only I could see his face right now; I bet he's look so good.

"Christian she has no respect, being dragged into those homes probably did it."

"That's not her fault is it."

"It might've been, you don't know what's she's capable of."

"So you're telling me that you're trying to help girl you took in She's not your submissive." Submissive? What on earth is he talking about?

"Christian I said this earlier, I don't do that anymore. Three months is all I ask for you. She needs to learn how to respect others, not treat them like dirt. She may have gotten away with it before but she needs saving. Anastasia is going down a dark path,just like a certain young man did long ago." I can just imagine how her tongue is weaving her manipulation.

"Enough, Elena. Two months and if she plays up and causes chaos, I won't hesitate to send her right back here." The authority in his voice sends shivers down my spine, I close my legs and squeeze them together, forgetting about the dull ache between them.

"Thank you Christian. I know she will learn well."

Learn well? My mind is puzzled. I stare blankly at the wall, trying to fit the pieces together, yet they won't fit. I want to go, but anywhere she will send me will probably be far worse than here. Christian has something odd about him. I'm not quite sure I'm ready to find out what it is. Two months? Really?. The ache grows. I don't even know this man. For all I know he could be into some weird things. But anything is better than here, better than being with her.

I glance at the clock again. 3:17. Time moves slowly as I think. I savour it. I pull the cotton seats up to my best, staring directly up at plain ceiling, just wondering what I am going to be doing in the hands of Christian Grey. It's cold, but the burning sensation on my back distracts me from the freezing temperatures. In these four years I have never gotten used to how cold the attic of Elena's house gets. I remember times where I would be curled up, shivering, not knowing if I could stand because I was is numb. Mrs Robinson didn't care then, nor does she now. My face rests on the tattered pillow, sinking slowly into it as my mind wanders to the mysterious Mr Grey. How can I live with him? I hardly know the man. Surely, it must be better than this. Surely, he can't treat me any worse than Elena does. I can handle pain. The burning on my back is prominent, but manageable, I could handle anything. Just like my head sunk into the pillow, I quickly sink into a restless sleep, waking a few times as I hear more murmurs.

When I wake again, it's to Mother, no Elena, shaking my shoulders.

"Anastasia, get up. You're leaving in fifteen minutes. Pack your things." Her voice is cold and monotone, as if she doesn't care. I don't ask any questions, due to my Eavesdropping from hours previous. My feet barely reach the floor, as I swing them over the edge of the iron bed. They plop into the floor and glide towards the wooden chest in the right hand corner of the room. I don't have many possessions and those that I do have, I treasure. I bundle my worn clothes into a small rucksack, throw my favourite books in and then my notepad. My books are my escape, my release from her wickedness. They give me a sense of security, whilst allowing me to lose myself within them. Pride and prejudice rests on top of the clothes, carefully places so the pages don't get torn. I run to the bathroom, brush my teeth and hair my best hair. My chocolate mess, dangles slightly above my breasts in an orderly manner. I opt for a simple pintail, to tame the beast, tied with a blue scrunchie to match my navy cardigan. My light bag is placed securely onto my back and I leap down the stairs a waiting my long wished for freedom.

At the bottom of the staircase Mr Grey is waiting. He wears the same as last night, except for a new, fresh silver plaited ties on his crisp white shirt. Where had the blood gond from last night? I assume Elena had it washed and prepared for this morning. In his hand is a travel bag, that I don't even remember him arriving with last night. This man is full of mystery. He welcomes me with a small smile, but doesn't look me in the eye. His grey or es wander around the room, avoiding me at all costs. Swiftly he he holds out his hand for my rucksack and mumbles "come along Anastasia." I obediently follow his out of the wooden sorry into the grounds of the house. Parked directly outside is, what I gather is his, expensive and rather ostentatious looking car. He circles it, placing my bag, along with his, in the boot of the flashy car. I stand there awkwardly, not knowing if I'm allowed to sit in it yet or if I am traveling separately. Christian, twists back around, opening the car door for me, signaling that i have permission to enter. The seats are the finest leather I have ever seen. They are so comfortable. I let out a strangled moan as I recline into them. It almost soothes my back, hugging it into its preheated embrace. Once the engine roars, the worried feeling I've had suddenly evaporates.

We don't talk. Classical music provides a barrier between us, as it undertones the mood. Christian is focused on the road, not even stealing a glance at me once. Last night he was reluctant to have me stay, of course he won't start a conversation. I bite my lip, pulling it between my teeth, tugging and releasing it over and over. He fidgets in his leather seat, rolling his eyes slowly. I see him shake his head in disapproval. "Stop biting that lip, Anastasia."he growls.

"It's.. uh.. Anna, Mr Grey." I attempt convensating.

"I don't care what you prefer, stop biting that damn lip."

"Why?" I whimper.

"Anastasia, life with me will be a lot easier." I hear his teeth grit, as he pushes out the words.

"But it's calming." It comes out more like a whine

The breaks slam. My body jolts forwards and then back, as I'm retracted by the seat belt. I look at Christian with a shocked face.

"For fuck sake Anastasia, you are not a child anymore. You do not get to complain. You do not get to whine. You are living with me, not Elena. You might get away with that infantile attitude there but here, I would take you over my knee right now." He presses the gas quickly and we are soon back to driving. Over his knee? What? I look away and securely bite my lip again. We don't talk for the rest of the journey, but boy do I have a lot of questions.


	3. chapter 3

We arrive into the heart of Seattle. Gigantic buildings scale the skyline, blocking the sunlight that's beaming down. The reflection of the buildings makes me realise how haggard I look. A sunken face, chapped lips and frail skin; no wonder Mr Grey isn't paying attention to me.

It's mid morning and people are covering every square inch of the city. I find myself admiring people out of the window as we drive past,not daring to take a look at the beautiful man beside me.

Escala is an amazing penthouse block, filled with the most prestigious people. Of course Christian has to live here. He pulls into the garage, hops out, collecting our stuff and makes his way to a side door into what I think is the building. I wait. _Am I allowed out? _Twenty or so minutes pass by and I still remain the luxurious car. The side door whips open, crashing into the wall beside it. An angry Christian stalks towards me. _Oh no_. _Please not this again._ He large hands heaps the my side door handle, yanking it open. He stares blankly at me. "Anastasia, why the fuck are you still sitting here?". He's more than angry.

"Uh.. you never said I could.. er… l-leave." I stutter. His eyes widen with realisation and nods. "Come along, Anna." He puts his arm around my back, his hand pressing deep. I squirm out of his clasp. _Oh no_. Christian's eyes narrow into little slits, glaring at me. "Anastasia get here." The hand goes to my back again.

"No." My voice is crystal clear this time.

"What do you mean no?"

"Please… don't touch me there."

"I will touch you were I please. Now come on." The anger in his face is very apparent. His cheeks pool red. The strain of shouting, obviously flushes him. I love that shade. Again, his hand finds its way back to that spot on my back. His nails dig into the blistering skin, sending waves of pain rippling through my body, making me yelp.

"Will you please act modest in front of my staff. Did you need reminding that you are not longer a child, Anastasia, you're Twenty Two." I simply nod, ignoring the horrific sensation surging through my veins, and let Christian guide me towards the exit of the garage and to the elevator of the main building.

Neither him nor i make a word until we arrive in his penthouse. It is how I expected it to be: clinical, modern and emotionless, much like Mr Grey himself. The inertia is plain, too plane. It feels almost like an office rather than a home. The walls are white, adorned with multiple pieces of artwork like at Elena's house. However unlike her art, it brings a sophisticated simplicity to the room, drawing your attention from the lack of trinkets and home like touches one should have. It's all open plan, no dividers, meaning I'll be watched like a hawk at all times. I have no escape. The kitchen faces south, overlooking the Seattle skyline. It's beautiful. The couch area appears to be immaculate, no trace of ever being used. It's black, contrasting with the white walls and the wooden floor. I could stare at this vast room forever!

Christian brings be back to my senses, leading through the beautiful palace up the winding wooden stairs into a narrow corridor with rooms flitting off in different directions. I follow him until we stop at the second door on left hand side. With his large muscular hands, he twists the silver knob opening the door, revealing an expected plain bedroom. "This is yours, whilst you stay with me." He grumbled. I nod. Instead of all the walls being white, one back wall behind the double bed is silver, giving it a slight edge. There's a dresser in the corner next to a small vanity, which holds several types of expensive cosmetics. Did he organise this? For me..? I clutch my rucksack between both my hands, standing in the centre of the room. It doesn't occur to me that Christian is still standing me as I admire the furniture. I glance over his way, "thank you sir!" I send a small smile his way signifying my gratitude.

"You're most welcome Anastasia. I will be in my study, which is off the kitchen, please unpack, shower and change. Be there in fifteen minutes."

"Certainly, Christian." His faces snaps, clearly agitated from my response. I look up inquisitively.

"To you, it is Mr Grey. Only family or close friends call me Christian, and you are not my friend. You are just an immature little girl who can't stay in a home for two seconds without wrecking it. You're a burden, Anastasia, not a friend. Now go, you stink." With that he stomps out of the room, slamming the door behind him. The art rattles as he exits and tears swim in my eyes. Fuck you Christian.

The water of the shower is scorching under my faint flesh. It burns but I remain under there as a punishment, mother would of liked that. I should of never of called Mr Grey by his given name, that was wrong of me. Reluctantly, I stay under the sizzling droplets and search around shower shelves for some type of soap. You stink! I probably do, so I grab the nearest bottle and laver myself in the suds, washing away all the grime from Elena's house hoping that it will rid me of every wretched memory of that place. The towels are fluffy around my body as I exit the bathroom back into the bedroom. My wet feet pad on the floor, leaving a trail across the grey carpet, as if Hansel and Gretel. I check the time on the small clock upon the bedside cabinet. Oh fuck. I have two minutes left. He's going to be so angry. No, he's going to be furious. I'm so stupid. I stumble across the wet carpet to where I left my clothes, no even bothering to get fresh ones from my bag. That will anger him too. Clumsily, I slip on my navy cardigan along with the black skirt and white shirt and I race down the stairs, trying not to miss a step. My heart races as I plummet across the floor boards, through the kitchen, into the conjoined room beside it. As I cross the threshold of the study, I already know I'm in bother.

Christian sits in a leather chair behind a large mahogany desk. He leans back in it with a smirk crossing his lips. I frown, looking down towards the floor. His fingers motion for me to come closer; the index pointing towards me, then curling upwards and finally retracting towards himself.

"Oh Anastasia three minutes late" he tuts as I walk closer.

"I… I'm sorry, I was in the shower too long and i couldn't find anything and it took longer than expected. " I ramble nonsense hoping that it will distract him.

"Do you think I care about what you can and can't find.?"

"No sir."

"Then when I ask you to come to me at a certain time, I expect you to be there at the given time. Is that hard to understand? Did I speak in a different language? Or where you simply not listening to what I was saying?"

"N-no you were clear, Mr Grey." I mumble as I reach his desk.

"Take a seat Miss Steele." I willing take a seat in a black leather chair, crossing one knee over another and looking down towards my bare feet.

"I want to ask you, what would you like from this experience, Anastasia? By this experience i mean learning respect under my careful guidance."

"Uh.. erm.. I d-dont know" my voice trembles. I don't really know why I'm here. I don't need teaching respect. Its Elena, not me.

"You don't know?" His voice booms. Christian moves around the desk, perching himself against it right in front of me. His eyes glare down at me, analysing every tremble I make.

He continues his little tirade.

"Have I failed to remind you, that you are under my roof? That this is my house? That I have willingly took you in to help you become a better person? Have you really forgotten all about that? I thought you were a troubled girl who needed guiding along the right path, but you Anastasia Steele are a whole other level of trouble. Fifty shades or trouble more like. You are compliant in most tasks and ask permission for everything yet you test every limit I have. Anastasia I assure you I am all for testing limits but you seem to push every button I have." He Huff's as he rushed out every word at a tremendous pace. I push limits?

"I'm sorry Chr.. Mr Grey. I'm really sorry." Tears begin to pool in my eyes.

"No, you are not sorry. You have been here, what, an hour and I'm ready to throw you out. If I wasn't up for the challenge you'd be back at Elena's house right now. She was right, you are a nasty piece of work. I don't even understand why she deals with you." He spits.

Tears cascade down my cheeks. I've cried a lot today. This gorgeous man is so tenacious in his criticisms, that the frequent dig is only expected.

Christian reaches forward, grading the collar of my white shirt. He grimaces at the sight of it and pulls his top lip between his teeth. I hear a defeated huff escape his lips as I close my eyes. Is he going to hurt me?

"I thought I told you to get change?" He mutters, running his hand through his hair.

"i-i didn't want to be even more late than i-i already w..was."

"You defy me at every opportunity. It's disgraceful. I think I'm going to have to get that out your system."

With a swift movement I am out of the chair and over Christians lap, my behind in the air and my head dangling towards the carpeted floor. His hand glides up the back of my calf up to the top of my thigh, Twitching near my panties. I quiver under his touch.

"Do you like that Miss Steele?" He questions.

My skirt is moved so my pantie clad behind is on show. I begin. To struggle against his touch, trying to stop whatever Christian is trying to do.

"Now.. now Miss Steele, moving will only make matters worse. Now be a good girl." Mr Grey wraps one are around my waist stilling my movements, and the other hangs in mid air. Suddenly the free hand comes shooting down, spanking my behind with one huge wack. I whimper. What is he doing? Is he really spanking me? He does it again and I groan against his harsh touch. My bottom throbs at his relentless assault. His movements get harsher and the echoing sound of contact becomes louder. Little moans and pleas escape my lips.

"S-s-stopp!" I beg.

Another smack.

"Please!"

Another.

"Christian…"

Harder.

His actions halt but we remain in the same position. He reaches for my hair, yanking my long brown locks causing my head to jolt upwards.

"If you act like a child, Anastasia,I will treat you like one. And what do naughty children get? Spanks." My hair is released and my head falls back down. With one final blow, I hiss in pain and tears cloud my vision. Mr Grey stands, pushing me off him onto the cold floor. I just sit there and son. Casually, he moves back around to his chair behind the desk, leaving me on the floor.

"Thank you for your time Miss Steele, I'm glad we could work out our differences." He smirks whilst stapling some papers together.

I scramble to me feet and run to the door.

"One more thing Anastasia." I turn to face him.

"Welcome."

I stare at him confused.

"Welcome to my world, I hope you enjoy your stay."


	4. chapter 4

I find myself back in the silver room, holding my legs to my chest. My behind throbs as sit down onto the mattress, swallowing me whole. Why did Christian do that? It's certainly going to bruise by tomorrow. It's the shade of blood red, spreading downwards towards the backs of my thighs. My head hits the softness of the cotton clad pillow, allowing me to sink into it, letting my tears seep absorbing it just like a sponge. Silently, my body hunches, allowing shaking as I let out small sobs. My eyes seem weak as I cry, closing every few seconds, not even wanting to open again, ever. It was so embarrassing, who even does that? It was cruel not to mention hurtful. I let out a strangled sigh, as my eyes close for good, hoping that tomorrow will never come.

Sheets tangle themselves around my limbs, covering me a layer of sweat. I panic and push against them as I relive the hours just previous. _He comes closer, pulling my skirt upwards._

"stoppp" I cry.

_One blow to the left cheek._

_Another to the right._

"Please… no more."

_Another!_

I scream out loud, holding upwards in bed, my heart racing so fast. It beats like a drum against my ribcage, threatening to break free. The sweat is slik against my hairline, greasing if back. I shudder at the thoughts of my nightmare. Suddenly the door comes rushing open. A shirtless Christian with hair sprawled in all directions, enters my room in a swift motion. His grey orbs are panicked as he scans the room for me. I hold the headboard, scared. Christian strides closer with a sincere smile on his face.

"Are you alright, Anna?" he asks as he said on the edge of my bed. I now my head, not really knowing what to say or do.

"I heard you screaming, Anastasia, mind telling me what's got you so worked up?" His time is unusually calm and collective. it startles me a little.

"I.. uh...had a nightmare.." I mumble whilst chewing licks of my hair.

"What was it about?" he presses.

"uh… you.. earlier." I trail off at the end, not wanting to relive it for a second time.

"Anna what I did earlier, is not something I am proud of. It was very spontaneous and I shouldn't have done that to you. It was wrong of me. You just seem to push me to my limits by just opening your mouth and I don't even understand why. It puts me out if my comfort zone."

"B-but.. Mr Grey.. Why.. why did you do it?" I continue to chew.

"Miss Steele, control is something I like to exercise. I suppose that's why Elena sent you here to stay. But that was a side if me that loves to control everything around me. Your subdue nature is adorable, but your stubborn attitude is something that needs to change. I think that's what Elena wants too."

"I-i don't think you should of hit me. It hurts." tears pool in my eyes again.

As they fall, Christian's thumb wipes them away. His hand comes down my cheekbone, along my neck and then brushes into my hair. He comes closer to my face, looking straight into my eyes. It's like staring into the universe; hundreds and thousands of undiscovered elements waiting to be explored. Let me explore you Christian, please… The way he nestles his fingers into my hair draws me closer to him. My eyes roll back. Please Christian.

"Anna I won't do that again, without your permission."

"My permission?"

"yes Anastasia, your permission."

"What did you mean by 'welcome to my world'?" I murmur.

"What did I mean? You'll find out soon my dear Anna. You have a lot to learn. I'm quite surprised that Elena hasn't been teaching you." teaching me … what?

"come on, let's get you to sleep." He says as I yawn.

Christian pulls away and unfolds the duvet. He slips himself under, making sure there is a space between us. Subconsciously, I move closer to him. Despite my initial need for comfort, Christian moves further away.

"No Anastasia." He sighs, clearly not wanting to have this discussion.

"I don't get you Mr Grey. You're horrible to me, and then you're nice to me and then horrible again. I can't keep up with you. You're like a yo-yo. You go up and down and you're so temperamental. Christian.. I just can't." My hands smack over my mouth, as I just register what I've just said. Ugh.. why am i so stupid? Stupid, stupid girl!

Defeated, he lets out another sign. "Miss Steele, I think you should sleep now. It's nearly four am. We have to be up early, though I might let you sleep in. I want to start your training early."

Once again, my face hits the pillow. The cotton hugs my face as I turn over to face away from Mr Controlling. The duvet is pulled right over me, engulfing me so I don't have any room to glance at him. I don't even want him here. I was fine without him. Mother wouldn't disturb me. Christian is tenacious in his ways, I've learnt that in the space of a day.

My backside still throbs as I find a comfortable decision. It's hard not to look at him and admire his beauty. I close my eyes, pretending that I'm not even here, pretending to be somewhere far away from all the pain and emotional struggles. After a few minutes of steady breathing, Mr Grey thinks that I've fallen into a deep slumber. He slowly slides out of the bed and the room and clicks the door behind him.

Sleep doesn't really come. I stay in bed just staring into the blackness of of the night. What does he have planned for me tomorrow? What am I going to learn. If it's anything like today I'm going to be riddled with pain. Oh for the love of god, please help me.

Christian wakes me at eight in the morning. I savour the last few minutes, not wanting to be late after my experience yesterday. Breakfast is laid on the kitchen counter in a sprawl of fruits and cakes. I don't really eat much under the domineering eye of Mr Grey, it's rather hard to concentrate. There's a nervousness in the pot of my stomach, churning and twisting it, making me feel extremely sick. He doesn't talk to me, only stares at me, watching my lips every time they curve. I pull my bottom lol between my teeth as I try to think of what I will be learning. I see him stiffen.

"Anastasia, you're biting that lip again."

I stop. "I'm sorry." I mumble.

Abruptly, he walked out the room but stops in the middle of the room. With his index finger, Christian he singles me to follow him, so I do as I'm told. I follow in his pursuit up stairs to the room at the end of the long hallway. The door unlike the rest is black. It stands out. Oh, and it does intrigue me. With a key he pulls out of his jean pocket, he unlocks the door and walks in, switching on the lights.

The first thing I see is a large bed in the centre of the room. Red satin's adorn it, all neatly pressed against the black bed frame. It goes well with the red walls that are home to lots and lots of toys… should I call them toys? From floor to ceiling, the walls are covered in whips, chains and ropes. Oh my.. My thighs push together. I run my hands along these foreign objects, inspecting them one by one. The whips are so smooth as I grasp them in my palms. They give me a sense of weakness and make me quiver under their touch. I move onto the chains and restraints. These leather cuffs pull my attention. Inquisitively, I pull them from the hook that they are situated and run the fine leather between my fingers. Somehow I totally forget Christians in the room, the red room. Shelves upon shelves hold several pieces of equipment. It all new. Never have I seen so many instruments in my life. My cheeks flush a crimson red, it rising from my neck bringing colour to my face. It isn't until I reach the other side, when questions start arising in my head.

Why am i in here?

Does he want to do this to me?

Christian, who's still perched in the doorway gives me a wary half-hearted smile. He seems deflated. I begin to open my mouth, but the quick witted man beats me to it, "what do you think of my playroom, Miss Steele?"

A smile also tugs on my lips, how can he be so cool about a situation like this?

"I think it's quite satisfactory, Mr Grey!" I humour him.

"Is it really? I though our lesson could begin in here."

"Mr Grey… what.. what happens in here?" I stutter, overwhelmed by everything in front of me.

"Anything I want to happen. I bring you pleasure."

I run a whip through my hand. "This," I motion towards it, "doesn't look like something of pleasure."

" it will give what I want it to give. Pain or pleasure."

"That's not something I'd like,Mr Grey." I stare, turning on my heels.

He's hot on my pursuit, following me into the corridor. "Anna… wait" he pleas.

I stop dead in my tracks when he calls me by my nickname.

"What, Mr Grey?"

"Let me show you, how good it can be."

"Christian…"

"Anastasia, you can stop whenever you want to, please let me show you how pleasurable this experience can be."

"What about Elena, and bring sent here to learn respect?"

"You are respecting me, you're being obedient. You're giving yourself to me. That's my definition of respect."

"Okay…" I murmur, Intrigued by his perception.

"Oh, Anna." He grabs my waist guiding me back to the red room.

Christian locks the door behind us. I turn to look at him. His eyes widen withlist and excitement, clearly trying to contain his eagerness. I take a seat on the bed, waiting for him.

"Christian… Mr Grey..?"

"Yes, Anastasia."

"What are you?"

"I, Miss Steele, am a dominant and you my lovely girl is the submissive."


	5. chapter 5

I am laid between the satin sheets, my hands above me pinned to the mattress.Christian hovers over me, staring, staring right into my soul. _Oh christian do whatever you want to me…_ he drags his hand up my naked thigh and under my skirt, just like yesterday. _Shit yesterday._ I scrambled upwards, coming back into reality.

"No… Y-you promised… not that again." i murmur.

Casually, he slips his hand from under my skirt and brushes it against my face, rubbing it slowly. It grips my jaw, tilting it upwards to make me look him in look directly into his eyes.

"Anastasia, i told you last night and i will tell you again, I will not do that again. Not without you permission, of course," he takes my hand stepping up from the bed, " come on we should discuss this some more."

We stroll out of the red room, towards his study. His hand laces with mine, intertwining our fingers. I long for this moment to last a little longer, for just for once that time would be on my side and let me savour this small but intimate moment. I give his hand a little squeeze, reassuring him a little. Lord knows what's running through the man's brain. It seems like we haven't even traveled anywhere as we reach the study. If only it was longer.

I haven't been in the infamous study since the spanking incident; it discourages me slightly. Christian takes a seat behind his desk again and pulls a document from his desk drawer. He lays it neatly on the wooden desk, waiting for me to be seated as well. It seems very business like, which makes me feel even more uneasy.

"Anna, i would like to give you this so you can read more about how i would like to conduct your stay. I wouldn't want you agreeing to something without acknowledging what it actually is. I know i like to play unfair, but that is unrealistic." I nod my head and look at the papers on the table.

_Dominant and submissive relationships.__introduction:__A dominant and submissive relationship is a relationship the expresses power through sexual and non- sexual roles. Dominant's exercise control in most activities. This can include in sexual relations and in the domestic nature. He/she can express this in restraints, bondage and hard limits for the submissive. Domestic control can include the control of sleeping hours, what the submissive wears ad what he/she eats. The exercise of control may be pleasurable to the dominant and the submissive and sets the foundation of trust within the relationship.__Trust:__Trust is key to continue the relationship. Without trust neither the dominant nor the submissive can communicate honestly with each other. It's important to be truthful to each other, otherwise the relationship will not work. The dominant needs to be told the submissive's hard limits before engaging in any sexual intercourse. Hard limits will be outlined further in this text. Without trust, it is pointless in carrying out this type of relationship. The Submissive needs to learn how trust the dominant because in a BDSM relationship, the dominant has total control. He/She needs to learn how to metaphorically give her heart and soul to the dominant.__The submissive:__The submissive is typically referred to as the "bottom". He/she takes on the role of being compliant and subdued to the dominant, giving himself/herself completely to him/her. As outlined earlier this can be in a sexual and non-sexual way. Typically, the submissive is there to pleasure the dominant when asked to, no matter where they are. He/she needs to be totally compliant and be willing to do anything dominant desire. Although this is subjective to each and every BDSM relationship. The dominant will set the rules once the submissive gives consent to the relationship.__The dominant:__The dominant is normally referred to at the "top". It's his/her job to take care of the submissive and give them a safe and nurturing environment to feel comfortable to express any emotions. The dominant must have the consent of the submissive to ensure it is safe relationship. The dominant is expected to outline all rules and make them as clear as possible so the submissive sees no confusion. In addition, the dominant requires the submissive to be clear about her thought and opinions so they can amend the rules.__Hard limits:__Hard limits are things such as sexual acts that the submissive doesn't feel comfortable participating in. If the submissive agrees to participating in a hard limit, he/she will say the safe word YELLOW if he/she is close to reaching her endurance and the word RED if he/she completely reaches his/her limit. These limits will be discussed when going through the rules.__Soft limits:__The opposite of hard limits are soft limits, which are typically sexual acts or gestures that the submissive is completely comfortable with. The dominant with try out new toys, restraints or implements and the submissive will comment of if it is a soft or hard limit. This will determine what he/she is comfortable with. Soft limits can also include non sexual acts depending on the kind of relationship the dominant and submissive have, it's subjective to each different type of relationship.__Rules:__The rules are subjective to each relationship because each one is different the other. Rules are there for the dominant to control the submissive, but to also absurd the ential safety of the sub. The dominant has to care for the submissive and ensure of his/her mental and physical well-being. Rules are generally discussed before entering the relationship and are supposed to be clear and concise. Most BDSM relationships include the rules of:__You must follow all requests the dominant sets.__You must eat regular meals and maintain a high level of fitness.__You must please your dominant.__These are only example. Each dominant and submission relationship choose rules that suit their needs and wants_.

I place the pieces of binded paper back on the table, overwhelmed by the flow of information. Christian sits there apprehensively, waiting for me to say something. I notice his lips twitching and his eyes flicker between me and the pieces of paper. I don't know what to say. Dominant and submissive… does he really think that i want to give myself to him? I don't really know if i can. Elena wouldnt approve. She would be sat there in her leather chair, with a glass of shiraz in her hand pointing out all my flaws, telling me that i am whore for doing this. My breath hitches at the thought. Am i really a whore for wanting this?

My attention turns back to Christian. Oh he's so gorgeous, too gorgeous for me. I clench my thighs and rub my palms together, looking at him.

"Christian.." his names slips out breathlessly. "Is this what you want me to do?"

"Yes Anastasia, give yourself to me. Give all of yourself to me. I want you to trust me." I see the eagerness beams in his silver eyes.

"And what if i don't want that type of relationship… i've never been in a relationship.."

"You.. you haven't?" He sounds shocked.

"Yes…"I mumble, not knowing if it is a good thing or a bad thing.

He stands moving across the room, just like last time. Oh no! Not again. Christian hovers near the door and I'm just sat there, not even knowing what's going to happen. My heart palpitates, drumming at a thundering rate.

"Are you a virgin, Miss Steele." The words lap his tongue. Oh Mr Grey… My legs press firmly together trying to relive the unfamiliar pressure between them.

"yes.. yes.. Mr Grey, I am."

There is no words to describe the look that glooms over his face. A low groan escapes his lips as he composed himself. Nothing but excitement is apparent. I expected him to be angry. Christian glides back over in his gracious way, taking my face between his large palms, his thumbs just skimming over my bottom lip. I shudder.

"Oh.. Anna, how did I find you." His words just sweep me off my feet, charming me like I'm a Disney princess. The rugged sound if his uneven breathing sends wildfire through my veins centering at my core, what a wondrous feeling!

"I don't know, Mr Grey." Subconsciously, my bottom lip is snagged between my teeth.

"Anna.." he warms playfully, lust growing in his eyes.

Christian's arms clasp around my waist, picking me up and sliding me onto his desk. Papers and stationery fly off the table falling onto the floor. A giggle erupts from my throat. White peels flash at me. I've never seen him smile properly. He's such a cold faced man, much like Elena. Seductively, his grabby hands work their way back up my faint flesh and under my skirt, toying with the fabric. My cheeks are flushed with embarrassment and adrenaline. More of the latter I think. One hand remains on my thigh, drawing small patterns that tickle, whilst the other goes to my blistered back. I grab his hand, pleasing him not to, which makes curious Christian do it again. I pull back from his fraps for the billionth time today. My eyes beg for him to not ask anything.

"Miss Steele, for this relationship to work you need to honest with me, what is on your back?" He asks calmly, but is clearly agitated. So we are back to miss Steele…

"Nothing.." his hand digs feel into it.

I wriggle under the pressure of his hand. My back aches and I let out a small cry of desperation. "Please.. stop."

The hand retracts "Anastasia please tell me, I will take off the top and look myself."

I flinch, "NO!" I shout. It comes out louder than expected.

He moves back, and I sit there and cry. All I seem to do is cry. This is all too much: the red room, the spanking, the documents, the touching , the mood swings. I can't keep up. My mind whirls around and around, driving me crazy. My tears spill down my face as sobs reckon through my body. I glance up through my messy brunette locks up at the gorgeous man stood right in front of me. He offers me a sympathetic smile. I thank him in my head.

"Trust me Anna, I won't judge you." He whispers, closing the distance between us.

"N-no."

"You said okay to my proposition earlier Anna, you have to trust me." Those fingers find their way to my face again, wiping a few stray years.

"Please.. don't make me." I beg.

"Just show me… you don't have to say anything." He compromises.

I gulp. " Why do you … why do you care?"

"Anastasia, I've had my eyes on you from when I brushed past you in Elena's hallway. You were mysterious then, even more now."

"You'll think I'm hideous." Tears flow even more now.

"Anastasia Steele, you're the most beautiful girl I have ever laid eyes on." I awe.

"Just looking… no talking."

"Yes.. no talking."

Undoing My shirt, I fumble with the small buttons. Christian holds out his hand to silently stop me. He motions to the door, "come on you can get a bath and shoe me, it will be warmer and you'll get more comfortable in showing your body to me. I won't touch, I won't ask questions, just come." I follow him, mimicking his movements we swiftly make it up the stairs. I assume that we are going to the ensuite in my bedroom, bit we turn to go to what I believe is his room. We step over the fresh hold and it just looks so … so… so… Christian! It has the same decor as the open plan room downstairs, white and black. But everything looks beautiful. One thing catches my eye, in the corner there is a grand piano. My heart just fills with warmth. A hand touches mind, grabbing back my attention, guiding towards his ensuite.

When I enter I hear the sound of hot water already running. Christian is lent over it adding expensive soaps and salts to the water. His shirt sleeves are rolled up to his elbows… how can he still look this perfect? I just stand there, like usual, waiting to be told what to do. Yet this time I am not told, Christian comes over and tugs my navy cardigan from my shoulders, discarding it on the floor. Next goes my skirt, he drags it drown my cream coloured thighs with his thumbs, bending down as i step out of it. One button at a time, Christian undoes them letting my shirt drop to the floor. He goes to my back, examining it. Not a word or a sound comes out of his mouth, he kept his promise. That makes me smile. What I don't expect is, him then unhooking my bra and kisses all the way down my spine. He peppers them, his soft, moist lips barely touching my skin. He's so gentle.

"You're beautiful Anastasia." With that my panties are peeled off my body and I'm helped into the bath

Maybe being subdued and pliant to his requests is not as bad after all.

_Oh...Mr Grey…. Save me! _


	6. chapter 6

Christian takes me out the next day. We find ourselves in the centre of Seattle, in secluded restaurant. He's quiet today, less daring and confident then he was the day previous, it disheartened me slightly. I really thought we were getting somewhere last night. He kept his promise, never saying a word about my scars, just admiring me, whilst washing me completely.

The restaurant is small, too small, but I seem to think Christian likes it this way. It has intimate decor, with shades of red everywhere in my eyeline, like the red room. Too much like the red room. There's not many people around us, only a couple in the other side of the room, not close enough to hear what we are saying.

Christian leans closer, brushing the brown strands of hair away from my face, staring deeply into my eyes. I could sit there and stare forever.

"Anastasia, a penny for your thoughts?" he inquires.

I grin,"I Don't need the money."

"well, Miss Steele tell me what's on your mind."

"A penny for your thoughts first, Mr Grey."

A smile creeps onto his face. "Anna, I don't need the money."

I giggle loudly, snorting a little. He glances his eyes over, eyes wild, _Oh Mr Grey…_

Christian purses his lips and then opens them again letting the words flow, "you look beautiful, Anna, so radiant and free." His hand brushes across my lips, skimming them gently, "Oh, how much I'd love to taste these."

"then..then… do Mr Grey."

"Not yet Anastasia, a penny for your thoughts."

This man just makes me smile. It breaks out and stays there.

"I… I just wanted to know… about your lifestyle."

"oh Anna," those thumbs find their way to my face again, "you could of just asked. There's no need to walk on eggshells."

"My lifestyle is purely there to bring us both pleasure. You do what I tell you and I will reward you. If you defy me you will be punished, like the other day." _oh god.._

"But… but I don't want you be punished.."

"Yes, I know that but hard limits will be set. You will not do anything that you're not comfortable with. I can promise that."

"I.. i don't know Christian.. I'm.. I'm a virgin. I've never.. done … things.. before." I choke out the words, not even knowing how to explain it.

"And why's that? Look at yourself. You are gorgeous." blush creeps up my face.

"I'm really not. You saw me… last night you can't love that."

Christian stiffen, retracting is hand from my face. "Anna… I.. don't love.." this is the first time I hear him stumble for words. The first time where he seems genuinely panicked.

My heart stops, my breath hitches and I feel overwhelmed. _What does he mean?_ Frantically, I push my chair backwards, trying to get out this place. "How can you not love? Everybody loves." The words come out pleaing.

"I just don't Anna. I'm sorry. I'm not your Mr Darcy."

"You want to do .. do all those… things to me. Yet you don't want to love me. I'm not going to have sex with someone who doesn't love me."

Tears flow yet again, the daily occurrence is becoming to feel normal.

"No.. wait… I can't love okay… I just don't have the emotional capacity to do so, please let me show you … how good it can be."

"You are Mr Darcy… you're mean, and demanding and sinister and plain old horrible. You fit him in every way." I explode.

"You just want me for my body, Christian, you don't want me."

With that I walk out the words, leaving him behind me. I stroll into the fresh breeze of Seattle, the smell of petrol and coffee fills my lungs, _i'm free_. This is my first time in twenty two years that I have walked down the streets of Seattle, without anyone with me. It's euphoric. My feet pad along the pavement allowing me to go anywhere.

It seems like an hour or two has passed, since I had left Christian. Currently, I am walking down the bank of the river, staring at the water rippling along. I find myself a comfortable spot near it, next to a tree and I lay myself there. Suddenly, I feel very tired, probably from all the mind games and mood swings. A wave of tiredness just washes over me. Against the tree, I feel my eyes flutter shut, hearing the sound of the water fill my ears, comforting me into a peaceful sleep.

"For fuck sake, Anna." _Mmmmm go away I'm dreaming. Shit I know that voice from anywhere.._

I wake to the gorgeous, cold hearted man hunching over me. I'm still sedated with the intoxicant of of sleep, so I don't reply to his angered remark. His face makes funny shapes, scrunching up and twitching when I don't answer. I hear him sigh loudly, giving up on even speaking to me.

"Anastasia, wake up please." I can hear the urgency in his tone, as I feel this fingertips brush through my hair, bringing me back to my surroundings.

It's dark now, and I notice that Christian had changed. He was no longer wearing his suit but now just grey jogging bottoms and a hoodie, making him look normal, how ironic. He looks even more beautiful in the night, _oh for God's sake Anastasia you're supposed to be mad at him._ Reluctantly, Mr Grey squats to my level, looking into the depths of my eyes. This is now something that he always does, but I don't say no, more do I hesitate; I always stare back.

"Come on, it's getting cold, and you're only wearing that thin cardigan." He shrugs off his hoodie, revealing smooth, toned abs, which automatically draw my attention. I stare at them, drooling like a dog. He hands it to me, "wear it, don't argue with me, I'm furious already."

I comply with his simple request. The jumper smells exactly like him. I take in the intoxicating smell, asking myself if this could be a legal high. I giggle to myself. Christian turns, questioning my expression, "do you find this funny Anastasia?"

"No, I'm sorry." I mumble.

"I had people looking all over Seattle for you. I even called Elena" _oh fuck… holy fuck… shit…_

I stop, dead in my tracks,"Christian no.. please… tell me you.. you.. didn't" I don't move at all. Christian tugs on my sleeve to try and get me to walk further. But I don't, I stay fixed in my position.

"Anna, what's up it's only Elena." The horror on my face is so clear, I'm shaking. I don't want to go back. I know I cry here but he doesn't hurt me like she does. He looks after me.

"Please… Christian.. no." I beg.

"Tell me what's wrong, Anna, I'll make it go away." He clasps my face between his hands, running smooth circles on my cheeks, catching every year that falls. I shake my head,knowing that I can't tell him even if I wanted to. I know he won't believe me. Sobs rake through my body, making me collapse onto Christian. He holds me up, hugging me.

"Anna, sweetheart, it's Elena isn't it."

I nod not being able to say the words.

Christian just takes in the whole situation and takes out his phone, dialing some number. _What's he doing now?_

"It's Grey...yes I've found her… no…. You're not picking her up .. she's under my care…. For fucks sake Elena it's been 3 days, are you missing her already…. I told you last night that I am keeping her…. She is no longer any of your concern… you understand… goodnight." His phone is dug right back into his pocket.

"It's taken care of, no Elena tonight, no Elena forever." A small smile ghosts my lips. I hug him as an almost thank you.

We walk and walk, back to his penthouse. The long, busy streets of Seattle bustle by as we make our way home… home? Is it really my home. In reality I have been there nearly four days and it's been better than four years with Elena. Christian doesn't mention her anymore. I'm glad he doesn't, but I know it will be brought up later. His hands find themselves in mine, knitted together, feeling at home in their pair. Every couple of seconds, I notice that he glanced my way, maybe to check if I'm alright. We don't say anything, we just stroll in the comfortable silence that is beginning to warm my heart. Christian's company isn't all that bad, his mood swings do make it eventful, but he's starting to save me.

After what seems like hours, we get back to the ostentatious apartments. Christian leads me into the huge open-plan living area and pours himself a glass of red wine. He leans against the kitchen counter, sighing for the millionth time today, and looks me up and down. Right then, I feel bare emotionally and physically. _Can I really give myself to him?_ There's a slight flush of red painted into his lips from the wine that makes him look even more desirable, _oh how I'd love to taste those lips.. _

"A penny for your thoughts, Anna" not this again.

" All these pennies and I'll be rich someday, Mr Grey." He laughs.

"Maybe richer than me, even. Come one let me contribute to that fun, a penny for your thoughts?"

"I.. I'm sorry for walking out on that restaurant this afternoon, that was selfish of me Mr Grey. You were taking me out and I just ran off."

"No Anna, you had every right to,I'm more annoyed that you fell asleep in the middle of a city, you could of been kidnapped, raped or anything. The thought of that pains me." He croaks.

"Nothing I can't handle." I mumble, more to myself than anything.

"What do you mean by that Anastasia?"

"No..no… it's nothing."

"Anna.."

"I said no.. A penny for your thoughts, Christian?" i change the subject.

"I'm worried about you, Anna."

"And whys that.?"

"You're so closed, so accepting of what happens to you. And when you do stand up for yourself you take it back hours later."

"I thought you wanted me to be compliant and subdued. That's what you want, for you to control everything."

"Not like this," he huffs,"that's only in the red room Anna. Outside of that we can be friends, housemates, whatever people call it. I need you to be able to say no." He sounds as defeated as I am.

"I'm sorry." He finishes his wine, drinking it in big gulps.

"Come along, let's go to bed, we'll figure it out tomorrow. It's later." In fact it's gone one in the morning and I'm tired.

We get to my bedroom door and Christian is about to walk to his room.

"Stay with me…"

"Anna.. I .. don't.. you know."

"I'm not asking you to love me.. just stay with me." I plea.

"Alright, come on "

I slip into bed first, dressed in one of Grey's tops, seems that I have limited clothes. He joins me after, just in his boxers. My virgin eyes. Sleepily, I curl up under the duvet, trying to get in the perfect sleeping position. Christian lays next to me, allowing me to curl around his body. Just before I fall asleep, Christian s voice is a meer whisper in my ear, "who did that to your back?"

I bite my lip, "my mother, I murmur, a yawn escaping afterwards.

I close my eyes, drifting in and out of consciousness. I feel a light pressure, graze over my lips. Peaking through one eye, I see Christian move his mouth onto mine, grazing it over my chapped lips. Our mouths move in sync, this beautiful symphony of dancing mouths and tongues. Too soon it had started and too soon it ends, as he places a warm kiss on top of my temple.

"Goodnight, Anastasia, my darling.. sweet dreams."


	7. chapter 7

Sun flitting through the blinds, straight into my eye line. Surprisingly, Christian is still sprawled across my bed, tangled in the silver sheets. He looks peaceful and innocent. If only he could stay like that forever.

I take advantage of my time alone. It's quiet in here, too quiet. The silence is deafening, making me think of the night before. All the memories flooding back to me. Christian shouldn't have to deal with me like this. I am guest. So stupid. I need to show him that I'm worthy of staying here, that I'm not a runaway.

_What else happened last night?_ I ask myself.

Oh fuck .. holy shit… the kiss. Oh my God… My mind moves back to the dancing tongues and smudged faces. Oh how I long for it to happen again. It was amazing. His stubble caused friction against my face as out lips moved, but the redness is worth every penny. He has soft lips, very soft lips. They were like plump pillows of joy that brushed against my skin. _Just wow… Christian Grey … what are you doing to me? Come on Anna focus. You need to show Christian .. remember… _

My feet glide across the floor, out of the bedroom, down to the main floor, shutting out last night's events. I hover in the kitchen, looking in every cupboard for cleaning supplies. It takes me awhile but in a large cupboard near Mr Grey's study I find them. I take all that I need and start on the kitchen. Beforehand, I take a hair tie from wrist, pulling back my hair from eyes so I can work easier. I take the mop and start of the wooden floor. It's tough and hard work, bringing me to a sweat but Mr Grey should be pleased.

I find a record player in the lounge part of the open plan room. Quietly, I put on a record, making sure the volume is hushed so Christian can continue sleeping. My hips sway to the rhythm of the music as I mop.

_Wise men say__Only fools rush in__But I can't help falling in love with you__Shall I stay?__Would it be a sin__If I can't help falling in love with you?__Like a river flows__Surely to the sea__Darling, so it goes__Some things are meant to be__Take my hand,__Take my whole life, too__For I can't help falling in love with you_

A hearty chuckle from behind me stunts my movements. I cling to the handle of the mop for support.

"Having fun are we, Anastasia." He smiles a sleepy smile, coming down the stairs. His foot lands on the wet wood and his smile fades.

"Anna, sweetheart, why are you cleaning?"

"I… uh… wanted to say thank you." I mumble,looking towards the floor.

"You don't need to clean to say thank you."

"B-but.. this.. this is how you show love."

"What?" His voice is panicked.

"Cleaning shows love and thankfulness, so I will clean for you." I start moping again, even quicker this time. _He will be happy,he might kiss me again._

"Anna stop." He barks, grabbing the mop from my hands.

Tears form in my eyes, but he says "we don't clean here to show love or thankfulness. We say how we feel. No cleaning, come on."

"Okay.." I feel uneasy.

"Who ever taught you that was stupid." He murmurs.

"Mother" I whisper.

Christian leaves that subject alone and guides me back upstairs. I sit awkwardly on the bed, not knowing if I'm in trouble or not. My troubled eyes scan the room for Christian, but he isn't in here. I just sit there, waiting, waiting for my consequence. He returns a few moments later, wearing tight faded jeans. They're probably Levi's, something expensive and Christian-like. Striding forward, he says nothing and kneels himself on the bed. Even now he's still taller than me. His eyes are dark, clouded with lust.

"Did you enjoy that kiss last night, Miss Steele?" He hitches forward, closing the distance between us. I blush.

"I-i. … y..yes.." I pant, breathlessly. He twitches as I bite my lip.

"You bite that lip again, I'll bite it for you " he whispers, eyes locked with mine.

My hands a pinned above my head, bound with only Christians single one. His lips pepper down my face, along my jawline to my neck, but never once on my lips. I wiggle in frustration. His free hand, curves it's way onto my thighs, dancing up and down my milky flesh. This sends my nerves into overdrive. Electrical impulses surge through my veins, like it's a live wire and I'm gonna blow. A small, miniscule moan escapes my lips. It's a catalyst to Christians actions. His lips smash onto mine, like he's a starved man. I can't keep up. The sloppy symphony continues, lips smacking, tongues touching and curling. I can't help but moan again. Breathlessly, Christian holds my face between his palms, "where have you been all my life?"

"Hidden away." I joke.

"My princess." He whispers into my ear and then kisses my temple.

I stare blankly at him, a wave of courage passing through me.

"Love me." I simply say.

"What?" He retracts.

"Love me!"

"Anna… you know I don't love."

"But, these past days, you've done all these nice things. You've cared for me. That's love"

"I don't love."

"Let me teach you."

"You thought love was cleaning, I know what love is."

"I-i'll be your submissive.." I try. "I'll look through more papers. Only if you try to love me, I'll try to be your submissive."

"Are you compromising with me, Anastasia?" He smirks a little. I giggle at his remark.

"Oh, Anna I love that sound."

My arms rope around his neck, pulling him closer to me again.

"Please.." I beg.

"You don't know what you're getting yourself into, Anna. I'm not a romantic type of guy. I don't do normal relationships, I've never done this before." I see his vulnerability. Like me, deep down he has fears.

"Neither have I." I say quietly, cupping his face, the same way he does to me. The stubble on his jaw tickles me a little.

"i don't know if this will work. You have never had sex before. I am rough Anna, really rough. You're a delicate little flower."

"I trust you Christian… with my life.."

"Oh Anna.." he sighs.

"I give myself to you, Mr Grey. I am yours." I bow my head.

His hand comes under my chin, bringing my head to the same level as his.

"No, Anna, you stay as you are… you do not need to submit yourself to me. I-i will try and all flowery and romantic. I'll try if your way. But we do my stuff only when it's appropriate. I'll show you, not everything is painful."

"Yes." I smile, as he pulls me onto his lap, hugging me, carefully missing my lower back.

He swings me over his shoulder in a swift motion. I scream, shrieking at his sudden movements. We come flying down the steps to the Longue again. Christian tips me to the leather couch whilst he fiddles with the record player. Music comes blaring out, filling the room. He takes my hand like a true gentleman. Elvis plays again in the background.

_Wise men say__Only fools rush in__But I can't help falling in love with you__Shall I stay?__Would it be a sin__If I can't help falling in love with you?__Like a river flows__Surely to the sea__Darling, so it goes__Some things are meant to be__Take my hand,__Take my whole life, too__For I can't help falling in love with you__Like a river flows__Surely to the sea__Darling, so it goes__Some things are meant to be__Take my hand,__Take my whole life, too__For I can't help falling in love with you__For I can't help falling in love with you_

We glide across the room, in time with music. I stand on his feet, not knowing how to dance, so he makes an attempt to teach me. We settle on, me using his feet as a guide. I lay my head on his shoulder, as Christian holds me close. I have no idea what I'm getting myself in for or what's going to happen. But being fucked by a billionaire is the only thing on my mind.

The music continues and I fumble around. Christian lowers his lips to mine.

"You're an extraordinary woman, Anna, for I can't help falling in love with you."


	8. chaoter 8

The music comes to an end, the needle of the record player lifting up. Nothing could beat a moment like this. For this is the first time in forever, that I have felt at peace. My heart is racing, but not in the way it used to. It used to race in fear, but now in anticipation. Good anticipation.

My feet slide off the top of Christians in an almost childlike manner. I think he likes that about me, taking care of me. I think the lack of experience in the whole life department makes him want to help me, nourish and nurture me. I suppose he likes the sense of control. From what I can gather, that is something he takes great pleasure in. He has changed since I met him. In a good way. The cold, stone face I met at the party, has flourished into radiant smiling man. Well maybe, a radiant man that smiles at the most opportune moments. I like that about him. Him being reserved is almost a challenge for me, something always stimulating the mind, keeping me in my toes. I could never ever get bored with Christian, absolutely not.

I don't really how we end up in his bedroom but we do. It's dark and mysterious like him. I love it in here. The silver room is just too boring, here, is freedom. Freedom mixed with fantasy. I never know what can happen in here. Comfortably, we lay in his satin sheets, all tangled and intertwined reading one of my favourite books, the Great Gatsby. Christian holds the book up, whilst I lay against his chest, our feet playing with one another's. He doesn't look up once whilst he reads to me, the words forming from his lips, his tongue curving forming each and every word. I could just lay here all day and watch. Every so often, after a paragraph or so, he pauses and wets his lips and then continues. My body relaxes under the soothing words. That's the thing about Nick Caraway, he never spoke a bad word of anyone, so with the flowing syllables, all tension is lifted from my body.

I think we spend hours up in his bedroom, but I sit there listening to the love of Jay Gatsby. Christian's voice is so smooth and silky, just like I expect Gatsby's to be like. I lay there absorbing each word like a sponge. After a while he comes to the final page, turning it slowly, seeking a glance at me.

_"So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past."_ I gasp at the final line, a sob choking my throat. It gets me every time. Christian looks at me worriedly.

"Anna, what's wrong?"

"Oh nothing, it's just so sad." A few rogue tears fall.

"Oh.. Anna, I told you love stories never happen."

"He loved her so much, he waited and waited, have her everything she could possibly want and it still wasn't enough. It's not fair." I whimper.

"I know, sweetheart, I know." He smooths my hair trying to soothe me.

"He even covered up a murder she committed."

"Sometimes love just isn't enough."

"You're enough." I smile, sadly.

"What?" He asks clearly confused.

"You'll always be enough for me."

"Oh Anna."

He scoops me up into his arms, like I'm a baby, cradling me close to his warm chest. Christian squeezes tightly and I flinch. He gives an inquiring glance.

"My back." I grit.

As he registers what I'm saying, his mouth firms a little 'o' shape, realising. I lean forward, gazing into his eyes, silently thanking him for not making a big deal out if it. That's another thing I like, Christian's promises are never broken. Full of courage, I hook my arms around his neck, dragging it down to my level. My lips pucker, slowly meeting his. Christian's lips are so soft, making me conscious of my own. I fight the feeling to pull back due to my anxiety and continue kissing the gorgeous man in front of me.

He has a quick pace, something that I can never get used to. I am forever trying to keep up the fast rhythm of smacking lips and swirling tongues. My eyes are screwed shut, just enjoying this intimate moment. Christian's hands are all over me like a rash. No forget that, like a terminal disease. I can not get them off me. Not that I'm complaining. It feels wonderful. The way his hands move to the contours of my body, cupping my breasts and my behind. Oh Christian! Im literally in heaven. I can't help but let out moan. Its too much, yet everything I want.

"Make love to me" the words just slip right out. Well I've said them now.

"Anna.." his voice has the underlying tone of warning.

"Please." I lay back on the bed exhausted from the frustration.

"You're a virgin Anna."

"I think I know that Christian." I retort.

He chuckled at that.

"Please…" I whine.

I open my thighs wide and then squeeze them together, teasing him. Lust ravages his eyes.

"Please."

"Anna, you're not ready."

I lay back down on the bed and buck my hips.

"Please Mr Grey" I moan loudly.

My eyes are closed, I hear him take in a big breath, inhaling slowly. He exhales loudly and comes plummeting down on me, his mouth against my ear.

"Fuck it."

Christian kisses along my neck, sucking and tugging and nibbling on my skin. Little purple bruises, or love bites appear, decorating my flesh. I am restless under him grasp. My body wiggles and fidgets, wanting more, more of him. I am a mess. I pant and moan just wanting… needing more. The pressure between my legs is just too much and he's only touching me.

"Please.." I beg, bucking my hips yet again.

"What do you want Anastasia." His voice is loud and assertive,very dominant.

"Y-you… " I moan loudly.

With that his hands dive to my skirt, yanking it down, not even caring if it rips. He looks so primal, animalistic even, rating away my clothing like a starved man looking for for food. He reaches my panties and looks up at me for permission. As soon as I nod, they're gone, shredded onto the floor. The coolness hits me, sending shivers up my spine. Christian just sits there and gawks, taking in the sight. He runs his hand through the thin barrier of public hair.

"I like this." He growls, touching it again, moving lower and lower.

My breath hitches, as his fingers toy with my wetness. He lathers his hand in my pleasure, making it easier for his fingers to work their magic. He trails his thumb back and forth along my clit, making me break under the sensation. My stomach almost knots and twists. Christian cups me, flicking me, letting me moan under his single touch.

"Oh Anna, I like you like this. All sweaty, not bad mouthing me, just coming undone."

My stomach knots and and the pressure is building even more. I look up panicked, to a reassuring Christian.

"Let it go baby, let me watch you." He pulls my thighs wider apart, flicking and toying even quicker. The pressure is about to explode. I might be dying. My loans circle the air, as I grab the sheets around me. My head is thrown back and I let go like he told me to. My legs shake as I come undone, wobbling freely in the air. I come back into reality panting, stars of euphoria in eyesight.

"You look so beautiful Anna." I smile at him, weakly.

He doesn't waste a second, kissing me again. Bringing his weight onto me. Our hips circle, grinding against one another. The pressure is back again. Christian's erection digs deeply into my pelvic bone. Oh I want him now. He seems to occupied with my breasts, touching them delicately, handling each one with care. All of a sudden he takes one hard nub into his mouth, sucking, grazing his teeth against it gently. My head falls backwards. Oh Christian. I moan over and over. His hardness grinds deeper, I've never wanted something so much. With his free hand, it finds its way to my other breast, kneading it like dough, playing with my nipple in the process.

"Ah.. p-plea...se. Chris...please." I moan, struggling to even string a sentence.

My back arches, curving as another moan rips through my body. The nipple between his teeth is sore, but the good kind. The type of good that makes me want it have it continued. But I need him now.

Christian hovers over, looking deeply into my eyes. All I can see is lust. Maybe it's just in his, but I have a feeling our eyes a mirrored, equal, sharing the same wants. He kisses my forehead gently, "are you sure Anastasia, it will hurt sweetheart."

I shake my head, bit caring if it would hurt. "Please."

He nod and goes over to his drawer pulling out a condom, leaving it on top of the cabinet. His trousers come off, so does his boxers and that's when I fully see how big he actually is. Oh my god.holy shitting hell. God please help me.

Christian looks at me weirdly and then laughs, the type of laugh you would hear feoma child, the contagious type of laugh. I laugh back.

"Anna, it will be fine. If you want to stop at any point, I will. I won't be mad. You tell if you wanna stop and I will. I promise." Christian never breaks his promises.

The foil packet is loud when it opens in the silence of his room. Christian roles it on with ease and I can't help but sit there and watch, like the inquisitive girl I am. He pushes me back down onto the bed, very carefully making sure I'm comfortable. I wrap my arms around his neck as he starts to kiss me again. Our tongues silhouette with each other, a dance in which I will never forget. Slowly, Christian raises his hips, adjusting himself to the right position. I can tell he's a pro at this. He pushes in me with a hiss, burning his head in my hair. I bite my lip from the pain. It's apparent, but not as bad as I thought it would be. I can handle pain. There's a stinging sensation, like one you have after a burn or scratch but nothing that would even ruin this amazing moment.

Christian gives me time to adjust, before moving. When he does move I gasp loudly. He pushes back in hitting something good, very good. I moan almost instantly. I can't control myself. Subconsciously, I wrap my legs around Christian. This allows him better angle and it just writhes me pleasure. My hips join his, picking up the simple rhythm. In and out, moan and moan.

I hear Christian have a few uneasy breathes "fuck… baby you're so tight."

His face is buried in my neck, tangled in my hair. I lay there breaking uncontrollably under his touch, like a wishbone on Thanksgiving.

"Oh baby… ahh.. Anna… fuck."

"Ughh…Christian." I come undone again, more worse than last time, my entire body spasms. Not so long after, Christian collapses on top of me, panting, sweat dripping from everywhere, coming undone himself.

A rye smile erupts on Christian's face, " fucking hell, that was fantastic." He says between harsh breathes. This makes me giggle, pushing my matted hair away from my forehead. I am sore but if that's the reminder of what's just happened, I'll gladly take.

_I finally know why sex is such a big deal now._

"Anna..?"

"Yeah?" I smile sweetly,staring into his grey orbes.

"Was that okay?"

"Christian that was amazing."

"I'm glad." He smiles widely, bigger than the world itself.

We lay there, sweat clad and smelly but there in this moment, I feel like the most empowered person ever. Christian falls asleep with his head on my chest, ironic really. I stroke it, loving the feeling of the locks in my hand. For once I feel like the most powerful person ever.

I Anastasia Steele, just lost my virginity to a crazy billionaire and I fucking love it.


	9. authors notes

Hey guys,

so im going to update this weekend. I know you're all used updates every two days but due to personal circumstances , aka my boyfriend left me, i will not be unpdating till then.

Thank you ever so much for your support.

I love each and every one of you.

xoxo


	10. chapter 9

I wake up sore. My muscles ache like i've ran a marathon, scratch that, a hundred marathons. But somehow, a large smile spreads across my face, discarding any sign of pain. I lay back into the comforting sheets, reliving every moan and whimper of the night before. Oh it was amazing.

Christian is still next to me, which I'm quite surprised at. He seems the type that sneaks out the room in the morning. I could just imagine it. His arm is crawled over my waist, hugging it securely, making sure I'm close to him. As if I'd leave anyways, it's heaven here, heaven with him.

I untangle myself from his iron grasp, struggling. My legs are wobbly, eyes all disorientated and mind just purely fucked. I giggle to myself. The mirror in the closet is large, displaying my naked body back to. Oh god. I'm blossoming colours like a spring canvas, reds blues and purples adorning my delay in the resemblance oh hickeys. I'm definitely his territory now. My eyes drift down to my breasts. They look full and perky for tiny little things. My buds stiffen at the thought of Christian alone. It's amazing how my body is so stimulated. My thighs are embellished with hand marks, and oh lord do they make me quiver. I am used to the mark of punishments, but these marks, this artwork is forever priceless. Forever, will I be pleased to have the marks of Christian Grey on my body.

Footsteps from the bedroom break me for my trance. A very rough and ready looking Christian wraps his hands around my waist, not applying too much pressure on my back, and smiles deeply to me in the mirror. This makes me smile. It's contagious. I have never been this happy… ever. He observes the situation, obviously seeing that I'm naked.

"Admiring yourself Anastasia?" He jokes, sending giggles wrecking through my body. I can't stop. I feel like one of those preppy school girls that swoon over the hot boys.

My head hangs low, embarrassed. I hide myself behind my unruly hair.

"Hey… hey .. hey… no need to hide, I love that you're admiring yourself. You're beautiful Anastasia and you should look at yourself and see that too."

"You really think that?" I'm surprised.

"Of course sweetheart." He presses his lips to my forehead and moves swiftly towards his clothes, rushing.

_Oh_.

"Where are you going?" My voice is panicked.

"Work." The one worded answer throws me off, plunging my brain into overdrive. Was I that bad? Oh, is he running away from me, hoping that I'll be gone when he comes back? As I overthink, Christian glides across the closet,getting changed into an expensive suit and matching tie, grey of course. He doesn't speak to me, which concerns me further. I'm left there as he exits the room, naked and cold.

I follow his pursuit down the stairs, not even bothering to cover up. I'm hot on his heels, as he moves into the kitchen, pouring himself some coffee.

"What are you doing Anna?"

"Where are you going Christian?" I fire back, quicker than I anticipated.

"I asked a question first."

"And I want mine answered first."

He grits his teeth, "I, Miss Steele, am off to work, some of us have to." He spits.

"So you fuck me and leave. I always knew you were the sort, Grey."

*Anna… darling, I've taken a week off because you were settling in and now i have some big business deals to attention because I postponed them. So I am not going to fuck you and leave you. I fucked you last night and I'm leaving now, the difference is I will be returning around tea time. And if you don't shut that pretty little mouth of yours, I'll spread your legs over this kitchen counter."

I'm gobsmacked, not even knowing how to reply. His response is so cruel, yet unbelievably funny. I can't help it but j find myself giggling.

"Stay in here, Taylor will keep an eye on you. My email is on the fridge if you need me at all," his lips brush mine lightly, "laters baby!"

I wave him off like a proud wife.

How am I supposed to message him? Clearly, he hasn't thought this through very much. I don't even have access to a phone or laptop, let alone his internet. I haven't used a phone in years, not since I left my foster family.

Curiously, I go to check the fridge. The sleek sliver, tip of the range fridge freezer has a little green post-it note with his curvy writing scribed across it.

_My email is -__I hope you have a good day, please feel free to use my computer in the study, the password has been taken off for your personal use. I will be back later, maybe we can go out for dinner.__Message me,__Laters baby._

My heart flutters as I read the note. He wants to speak to me, even at work. Oh my God. I find myself doing the high school girl thing, making a big squeal at the sight of his words. Just by reading the script I can imagine the way his mouth curves around each word and the way his tongue will flick against his teeth or lips. He would be so beautiful speaking to me, even more beautiful than this note itself. He cares, he really cares.

I find myself in his study, the study where he first spanked me. I quiver at the thought. His MacBook sits open on the mahogany desk, the home screen dim, waiting to be turned on from standby. I sit in his comfortable leather chair, sinking in it, wrapping myself in the scent of Christian Grey. Once I open it to email, I try and compose myself, he wouldn't want me bothering for nonsense. Her want something intellectual and considerate, just like himself. Surprisingly, as the screen lights, I find an email address already set up.

Oh Christian!

**To:****From:****Christian,****Thank You for allowing me to use such amazing technology. I think it is very kind of you to allow me to contact you whilst you are working. I am sure you are very busy, but if love to accept dinner tonight.****Many kind regards,****Anastasia.**

I send it, my heart pounding, hoping that he'll reply quickly.

**Anastasia,****Thank You for accepting the dinner tonight, it is with my parents.I hope you don't mind. I will have a dress brought up to the apartment a little later on. I think you will look ravishing in red. I do like the colour of blood.****I have a meeting now.****Laters baby.**

_Oh my God, his parents, what the fuck am I going to do? _

I'm just the girl that falls into tables and sets the house on fire, I'm not worthy if their billionaire son.

_Oh Lord … will Elena be there?_


	11. authors notes (04-07 14:34:04)

So I've had some more bad news over this weekend, which is a bit too personal. However i have a 2 week break, so im going to get sone chapters written. im hoping to have a chapter every 2 days. Thd next chapter will hopefully be out tomorrow, but uts my grandads birthday, fingers crossed.

love you all.


	12. chapter 10

A beautiful sleek red dress I hung on the wardrobe in the walking in closet. It flows freely to the floor, swirling bits of material adorned with beads embellishing the breast. The bust is low, in a v shape, diving down. And the back… oh the back is low, very low. It hangs downwards, material drooping and then pooling at the base of my spine.

_I can't fucking wear this!_

I know for a fact, that if I just try this I'm, my scars, blisters and burns will be on open view. How can I stand there and watch people pity me, question where they're from. Honestly, Christian's parents will just pity me too. I don't want that. I want a normal sit down meal, bit I know nothing of the sort sort will happen.

**To:****From:****Christian,****What the hell do think you're doing? I will not be wearing that stupid dress. It's too low cut in too many areas. I hate it.****Yours madly,****Anastasia.**

My fingers hit the keyboard at furcios pace, the clicking sound echoing around me. I sit there waiting for a reply, my fingers twitching in anger. How could he do this to me? Tears start to well in my eyes, but i know i am better than this.

The reply comes sooner than expected.

**To:****From:****Anastasia,****I see no problem with the dress. I had one of my beauty-business partners pick it out especially. You will look lovely in it Anna, please reconsider this. I will be home in an hour so we can talk about this.****Kindest regards,****Christian.**

Ughhh. I don't want to wear the dress, so i throw the ghastly thing onto the floor, not bothering to reply to reply to Christian. Swiftly,i make my way to the closet in my silver room. I scan the rails of gorgeous dresses, adorned with so much expensive material and lavious embellishments. They're simply beautiful. Some, like the dress Christian want me to wear, are very revealing. It would take a lot of courage to wear those, maybe in the future. My fingers, glide against the masses of material, silks, satins and cottons under my fingertips. They feel amazing, like a pillow, so comfy. I stop at a little black dress, well.. Not that little. It is a respectable length. The black satin is soft under my touch and in that moment i know i am wearing this.

I slip it on, slowly, making sure it covers all the right areas. It covers my back, the black satin, feeling cool and fresh against my skin. The skirt of the dress, hugs my hips and behind. It's just lovely. My behind sticks out and my hips have shape. I actually look nice. Presentable even. A wolf whistle from behind me, startles me, sending me tumbling to the floor.

Fuck.

Christian is stood there, leaning against the door frame, looking sexy as hell. His hair is all over the place, from which i'm guessing is the wind outside. He's literally sex on a stick. I pick myself up from the floor, not bearing to look him in the eye, but i already know he has a massive smirk across his face, beaming at me.

"Nice dress, Anastasia." His voice is kurt and blunt, a serious tone.

"Um.. yeah, i like this one." I whisper.

"I do prefer the other one."

"Well i prefer this one." i fight back.

His face twists a little, anger contorting on his face. He strides towards me, motioning his finger for me to come forward. I stand still. This only makes him huff.

"All you do is defy me, Anna. It drives me crazy." He drags his hand over his face. I can only giggle at his movements. Christian moves his hands to my waist, pulling me close to him. I can feel his hardness against my leg. I love the effect i have on him. His fingers, slowly drag up my thigh, shifting the thin black satin upwards, exposing my milky flesh. Christian closes his eyes, inhaling and then exhaling heavily, which only makes me whine, wanting more. Painstakingly, his fingers toy with my underwear, thin lace threading through his fingers. I shudder against his simple touch. They slip under the lace and then back out, teasing me completely!

"Christian.." I whine, almost like a child.

"Anna," he breaths, huskily, " This is what you do to me. You tease me, defy what i want. Don't do as i tell you."

With that he flips me, so i'm pressed against an empty shelf. His hands move my arms so they rest on the wooden shelf, giving me support. I feel his hands running up and down my legs, driving me insane. I wiggle against his touch, but his hands grip my sides stilling my every movement. His lips brush my ears, as him fingers play with my black dress which is now around my hips.

"You can keep this dress, it hugs everything i like, but first i'm going to fuck you hard, baby, very hard." The words let alone nearly undo me.

I moan giving him the consent he needs and with that my lace panties are ragged down to my ankles. Suddenly, Christians in me, thrusting hard and fast. My strangled moans fill the walk in closet, echoing slightly, mixing with his grunts of pleasure. The sound of skin smacking fills my ears, making me hit my peak as christian hits that spot. He rags my hair, pulling it in his hands, widing it around his wrist, pulling my head backwards. His lips brush against my neck, biting lightly, nibbling my skin. The way he pulls my skin between his teeth, causes me to quiver. Christian knows i'm nearly at my climax, so he gets faster, thrusting harder, making my breasting knock against the wooden shelf. He lets go of my hair as i come undone. I scream loudly, my head falling on the shelf as he fills the condom.

I come back to reality, when Christian pulls out. The sound of his zipper closing, somehow turns me on. Oh my god, Anna, calm down, i tell myself. Christian helps me up, his hands snaking around my waist, pulling my knickers up and dress down.

"You're simply beautiful baby, i wish i could keep you here all day." the glint in his grey eyes, excites me.

"Thank you!" i say breathlessly.

"Come on, let me do your hair before we go. You look freshly fucked." I giggle at his remark and follow his pursuit into my actual bedroom.

Christians fingers feel amazing against my scalp. He runs his fingers through my hair, detangling the mess he created almost minutes ago. My cheeks blush scarlett just at the thought. Calm down, Anna. He twists my hair into a knot, securing it at the top of my head with a few hair grips. Then, he pulls a few loose strands to the front of my face, making it look sophisticated rather than messy. I smile at him, an almost thank you for everything that's happened today. He then disappears for a few seconds and then returns with some super high sparkly heels in his hand. I gasp, half at how beautiful they are, half at how the fuck im going to walk in them.

"Christian they're gorgeous."

"I know, my angel, you'll look stunning in them."

"I can't walk in them." I giggle a little, trying to lighten the mood.

"I'll help you, don't worry."

"You'd like wouldn't you?" i snap a little.

"Anna.." he warns.

"Sorry.. Sorry.. Come on let's get this over with." I mumble, whilst trying to get these stupid shoes on.

"They'll love you."

"No they won't. I'm that stupid server, that fell onto a table and caused a fire. To them i am just trouble." I huff, getting annoyed.

"I've spoken to my mother, Anna, she doesn't think that of you. She is actually happy that i am bringing company. This is a big thing for me, i don't bring girls home."

"You mean, you don't bring submissives home."

"You're not my submissive, though are you Anastasia." His temper is heightening.

"No just your fuck buddy then."

His one of his hands clasps both my wrists together, the other other tilting my face up to look him straight in the eye.

"You, Anastasia, are more than a submissive, more than a fuck buddy. You are brave, smart, clumsy, crazy, erotic and beautiful. Not to mention kind, generous and you always know what you want. I have never wanted someone more in my life." He releases my hands and the caresses my cheek, planinga kiss on my lips.

"Come on Anna, my parents are waiting."

_Fuck me… Christian..._


	13. chapter 11

They Greys house is better than I ever imagined. Its huge. They own this huge manor on the edge of Seattle, amongst the thick luscious greenery. It's something out of a fairy tale. A pressing hand on mg back, guiding me forwards, brings me back to reality.

"You coming princess." Jesus Christ, Christian you may as well fuck me here! My inner goddess is raging inside.

My shoes are killing me and I'm not even up the steps to the front door. The silver straps dig in, burning my flesh. I don't even bother to argue with Christian because I know I won't win. So I silently whine every no and then, whilst walking slowly so the shoes don't cut me further. Christian's hand on my back steadys me, ensuring that I won't fall over and embarrassing myself. He give me a small reassuring smile, encouraging me to look a little happier.

We enter the building, greeted by his parents and I'm not going to lie, I'm practically shitting myself. But I am soon pulled into the warm arms of Grace Grey. The smell of some expensive perfume fills my lungs, suffocating me along with the life crushing grasp she has on me.

She didn't look like Christian at all, which is odd. Nothing remotely is similar except the same hair colour. Grace is dressed so casual, which makes me feel overdressed. She wears a simple jumper and a matching skirt, which makes her look so elegant. Whilst Mr Grey wears a shirt and some black pants and remains in the background just observing the situation.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Anastasia." She's so warm and welcome, nothing like initially expected.

I blush at her. "Thank you, Mrs Grey."

"Please call me Grace, and this is my husband."

"Nice to meet you too."

"The pleasure is all mine Anastasia."

Christian snakes his arms around me, pulling me into the drawing room. At first it shocks me completely. The walls are so beautiful, so tasteful and extravagant. They have silver patterns, some of which look European. It screams their wealth and position in society. But the decor accompanies it amazingly. The silver chairs fit perfectly with the grand black wooden table. I could just live here forever.

"Anna… Anna baby." Christian whispers in my ear, his lips brushing it slightly, bring back to my surroundings.

"yeah." it almost comes out as a moan.

"everyone's talking to you and you're just spaced out." he chuckles.

"No… no.. I was just thinking .. sorry…" my attention turns to Grace, "you're house is so beautiful, I was just admiring it."

"Oh honey, you're always welcome here. Maybe i could show you the rest of the grounds whilst Christian takes a few business calls. He always seems to be busy with those things."

"That would be wonderful." I smile.

Grace whisks me off to the show me the rest of the manor like house. I feel like a tourist, like this is one of the seven wonders of the world. Elena's house was really beautiful, but this has to top it, like really tops it. We find ourselves up stairs in this clinical like office. She quickly shuts the door behind us, standing closely to it.

"This is my office, for emergencies."

What?

"Oh, yeah." I try to sound like I understand this completely foreign situation.

"I am a doctor. I used to be a surgeon, but I work in the emergency department now." oh I understand this now.

"It must be a thrilling job."

"Yes, I really connected with the people that come through the hospital doors. Lots of faces and lots of stories."

I just nod.

"I found Christian in the hospital when I was working one night. The poor boy was malnourished and wouldn't speak to anyone. I couldn't just leave him there, from the minute I looked into those big grey eyes I knew I had to take him home."

I can picture a scared little boy, just stood in the mist of the busy hospital and Grace being his hero, taking him home. Oh Christian.

"He's adopted? He never mentioned it." I murmur, toying with the material of my dress, not really knowing how to respond to a revelation like this.

"Yes, sometimes it's hard to tell about the past it causes a lot of pain, they're emotional scars I suppose."

The word "scars" makes me quiver. My eyes dart around the room, flitting from one object to another and my I begin to breath heavier.

She knows.

Grace steps forward taking my hand in hers.

"Christian told me about the scars on your back. We both assume they're not from that incident at Elena's house. You were barely even touched by those flames." her voice is calm, very professional, so this is Dr Grace Grey.

"Please.." my voice breaks a little.

"I know it's something you don't want to talk about Anna… but you can trust me. We don't have to tell Christian. I would not betray you like this."

"uh..m-my mother.. did t-this." I whisper.

She nods, "Christian told me, also Elena did mention you were in foster homes a lot when you were younger."

"All my childhood."

"show me." She presses.

I back up, tripling over my own feet and the tears begin to flow freely. I hold my hands in front of me. "No.. Please."

"Please Anna."

I hold my breath and look away.

"Anna.."

One… two.. three…

" okay.."

My hands glide to my shoulder, pushing the straps of the dress downwards. It's tight so I try and shimmy myself out of it. My eyes never look away from the floor. I can't look Grace in the eye. The dress falls silently to the floor. It's a painful silence, the tension could be cut with a knife. I turn to show her, giving her a three-sixty view, like I'm some kind of show piece.

And silence.

"Oh my god, Anna. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine.." I mutter.

"Who is your mother Anna?" I look to the floor again.

" She will never go near you again. I'll make sure of it."

Of course she will, she's your best friend you stupid… "NO!" I shout.

"it's okay, sweetheart. I'm going to go get Christian." She goes towards the door.

That's when I leap.

"NO!" I shout again.

"You can trust me." Grace claps my hands again sitting me down on her clinical bed. The coolness of the plastic makes me shiver.

Her it goes…

Three… two… one.

"It-it's someone… someone you k-k-know." My words are barely audible, as sobs wreck through my body. Grace wraps her arms around me, comforting me.

"I'm so sorry."

"s-she used.. used to hit me and uh.. erm.. p-pour .. pour w..wax on me." I cry.

Grace's face drops. I knew I shouldn't have said anything. I pull my dress up and make a quick exit towards the door.

"Anna I'm not going to force you to stay, but please talk to me." I can hear the urgency in her voice, it breaks me.

"No..You don't know anything." I snap.

" I know, but please. Who do I know?"

" fucking Elena." I shout, my makeup is now down my face and I'm running down the stairs.

I knew it would be like this.

I pass Christian and I hear him calling for me.

I drag my heels off laughing the across the lawn. My body hurls forward as I fall over onto the grass. He soon reaches me and slip the my matted hair from my face.

"it's okay baby. It's gonna be okay." sobs just continue to escape my mouth into the abyss of the open grounds of the Grey's manor.


	14. Exams

So some of you may not know but i am 16 and currently taking my GCSE's at school in the uk. For Americans i guess thats the equivalent of SAT's. So my main focus is doing them to my beat potential, but i promise after ive finish which will be the end of June i will update. i may do a few updates, but no promises.

thanks for all your support. i hope you understand but my education comes first.


	15. chapter 12

"Faster Anna!" Christian grunts as I ride him, bouncing up and down on top of his appendage. His hand grasp my hips, pulling the excess flesh between his fingers pinching a little. _Pain.._ The small nipping sensation contrasts with the burn of my thigh muscles, creating something euphoric.

_Is this what it's supposed to feel like? The fine line between pain and pleasure. _

I can barely get to think when he wraps my brunette locks around his fist, pulling my head backwards. A moan is my only response. Fatigue sets in almost immediately, but I know Christian wants to try this position. The deepness shocks me. I think it's the fullness of having him buried deep inside me, hitting each and every sensitive spot, driving me over the edge. Christ seems to like it this way, I can tell my the odd moan and manly grunt escaping his lips combined with the frequent eye rolls. My legs are pushed to breaking point and I bounce as fast as I possibly can. His shaftime to play with, a toy that I can control.

I don't know why Christian made me go on top. I thought he'd have me tied up by now. Just the idea of ropes makes me shudder in pleasure. Surprisingly, I haven't yet dismissed the idea of all domineering links Christian likes. I simply moan at the thought. His eyes lock with mine as I struggle to continue with the up down movements. He helps, thrusting his hips upwards a little,making it somewhat easier for me. Oh .. this gives an even deeper penetration. My head fly's back, along with my eyes.

"Christian oh… fuck.' the words string together and fall off my tongue.

I try and bounce faster.

"Call me master…" his face blank and serious.

"Ma… what…" it halts my movements.

_What is he thinking?_

Christian's hands cup my chin, tilting it upwards so my eyes are directly in line with his grey orbs.

"Look at me little girl." I could of came right there.

"W..what?"

"Call me master Anastasia."

"Anna.., Anna baby wake up." The smooth silky voice of Christian Grey brings me back to reality. His hands slowly stroking my hair.

"What's...what's wrong?"

"You were tossing and turning, Anna, I was worried. Look you're all covered in sweat too." He points to my clad pajama top, stuck to my skin and my forehead slick with sweat.

"Oh.. no.. just a dream." I mumble just wanting to fall back asleep.

"Did you have a nightmare baby?" The tone of his voice makes me feel childlike, almost as if I was not capable of looking after myself. But I suppose Christian loves it, the ideal control. He kisses my forehead.

"No, just an intense dream…"

"Care to share?"

"Uh… no, I don't really remember much…" my voice fizzles off, hoping he'll drop it.

Christian scoots closer to me, wrapping his arms around my waist pulling me almost on top of me. It's an intimate move from him, which is quite unexpected, but it makes me smile. I love it when he acts like this. My smile is faint, still painted with a mixture of tiredness and overwhelming feeling of uncertainty. His lips brush my head, as he buries his face in my hair, blowing on it like a silly little school boy. Instinctively I lean I to his loving touch, moulding myself into him, enjoying this moment of affection.

" I didn't hear all of what you said to my mother." this topic is abrupt and catches me off guard.

"Christian." I whine a little wanting him to let it go.

"I want you to know Anastasia, you can tell me anything, but in your own time." The sincerity in his eyes make me fall a little deeper than I already have.

"What did you hear Christian?" I sit up, distancing myself from him, pulling the blanket to my chest wanting to something to fidget with.

"I heard Elena's name, you shouted that."

My heart leaps out of mouth. I suddenly gasp for air, just by hearing her name. It sends nervous shivers down my spine, consuming me. A warm hand on my thigh, makes me glance back up to Christian.

"It's okay." That's all he says, but I know it's enough, enough to make me feel reassured and safe around him. That simple word makes all the fear collapse around me.

"She..she.." ,

Christian cuts me off, "baby, you don't have to…"

" I want to. She's my mother. She's the one who hurt me, the one who burnt my back and caused me misery for years on end. She's the one who dumped me I'm foster homes because she couldn't raise me. She hurt me… my own mother hurt me"

Tears now distort my vision, cascading down my face like some unruly waterfall. I try and fight it back but they just keep flowing and flowing. Christian's thumps wipe them away gently, making me feel grateful for his being here. He smooths my hair again, brushing it away from my face so it doesn't stick.

"Shhhh…" he coos "Shhh baby it's okay."

All I can respond is broken sobs and hiccups, as he engulfs me in a hug.

"We'll get through this together baby. Together Anna." He leans down and pecks my lips.

I take the opportunity to latch onto his lips, almost like a leach. My lips brush into his, pushing my tongue into his mouth, drinking up everything he's giving. A light groan enters my ears.

"Anna…" he warms. I love the way he warns me like a child, it's like he wants to scold me.

"Yes Christian…" I draw it out, my voice still a bit groggy from crying.

"You're not in the right frame of mind" his hand grips onto my wrist as I reach for his boxers. He stops my movements.

"Make me forget… please…. Make me forget…" I beg, wanting to feel good.

I use my other hand to work my way into his Calvin Klein's. Stretching under the waistband, I grasp his semi hard shaft in my hand. I begin to move my thumb over his tip, teasing him a little. A strangled grunt floods out of his lips.

"Are you sure," his hands are around my face again, bring my eyes to his, "you need to tell me that you are positively sure. I will not take advantage of you when you're vulnerable!"

"I want you…" the words come out breathless as my hands begin to work on his erection.

My hand glides up and down, stopping every so often go tease his tip with my thumb. I love watching the way his face twitches as he gets closer and closer. Suddenly I pull my hands away. Christian's eyes glance up and me inquisitively. I try and take his boxers off but fail miserably.

"Would you like help, little one?"

I bite my lip, "please."

Christian removes his boxers, discarding them to one side and goes back to his shifting position. Just like him, I remove my Lace panties, throwing them onto the floor. I rise, positioning myself over his shaft. Abruptly, his hands grip my hips to stop my intentions.

"Anna.. what … what are you doing?"

"Riding you." I giggle.

"Anna, baby you're still tight, it will hurt." His thumbs run circles on my waist.

" I want to…" I bite my lip.

With that he guides me onto his hardness, letting him burrow deep inside me. _Holy fuck, it's deep, really fucking deep_. His shaft fills me, making me fe full to the brim. It only make me quiver more. I begin to move up and down, slowly, getting used to this unfamiliar position. Each time I come back down, the fullness makes me gasp in pleasure. Christian steadies me, securing a firm grasp on my hips, guiding my movements, giving me a steady rhythm. He brings to get me to bounce faster, creating a quicker face. My breath hitches and words get caught in my throat as I cry out. Just the sight of Christian's eyes rolling back and my behind slaps onto his thighs, making a smacking sound echo in the air. After a while my legs burn, but I push muscles further seeking a much needed release for both of us.

"Holy shit Anna… baby."his grunts are music to my ears, making me reach my climax.

"Ahhh… Christian...M...m.." I stop what I'm about to say.

I go as fast as I possibly can.

_Up__Down__Up__Down_

"What...were…. Ah fuck…. Were you gonna say?"

_Up__Down__Up__Down_

"Master… I was going to say master."

He roars at the word, filling me completely with his seed, as he comes back to reality.

I get off him, avoiding all eye contact. His sewed seeps down my thoughts but I don't care. Worry racks through my body, as I try to gather all dignity I have left.

"Anna look at me…" his voice is rough.

"No." I shake my head.

"Little one please…" my eyes drift up to his.

"What…" I mumble.

"You called me master." Hd beams. "From the minute I met you I wanted that word to come out your mouth."

"Master?"

"Yes little girl."

"Take me to the red room, please."


End file.
